I’m a minimalist when it comes to writing: I think every word should justify its existence. And one word that almost never justifies its existence is suddenly.
Suddenly is the try-hard of words. It’s the word that needs to calm itself down, that you wish would leave the party because it’s drawing way too much attention to itself to the point of inconsideration of others. Do not make this word your plus one.
Consider the following comparison:
He was walking down the street, appreciating the warmth of early summer, when a man punched him in the face.
VS
He was walking down the street, appreciating the warmth of early summer, when suddenly a man punched him in the face.
Do we need suddenly in the second sentence? Nope. A man walks up and punches your character in the face? That’s shocking! We don’t need to be told it’s shocking; the event itself does the work. The fact that he was blithely walking along enjoying the day when something horrible happened—everyone’s nightmare, right there. No suddenly needed.
What about less dramatic uses of the word suddenly—times when we simply want to indicate that something unexpected occurred? Consider:
She was sitting at the kitchen table reading the news when her phone rang.
VS
She was sitting at the kitchen table reading the news when suddenly her phone rang.
Either of those sentences could be the lead-in to something unexpected—the next sentence will indicate what that is. At minimum, in this case, suddenly is unnecessary to the point of redundancy. Unless a call is scheduled, it’s always sudden—as are most actions that aren’t announced in advance. Doorbells ringing. Lightning illuminating the night sky. Lightning doesn't need the word suddenly. It’s inherent.
Maybe you think my antipathy is irrational? It’s not. In the first example above, the punch in the face is more shocking to the reader without suddenly. In both examples, words like suddenly rob our writing of power; we’re explaining ourselves to the reader, which is like explaining a joke. You’ve already lost them when you have to explain it.
This sort of explanation communicates a lack of confidence—as if we don’t trust our story or our ability to get across the import of what’s happening, so we have to pad it with extra words. You’re the author—the authority—so if you don’t have confidence in your words, the reader won’t either.
Here’s one last example to show what you can do when you want to indicate suddenness without using the word suddenly. Two people are sitting in a room. One stands up. You want that standing up to be surprising. Consider the following, with varying degrees of shock value:
Martha and George sat on the sofa reading. George stood, his book landing on the floor with a thud. Martha looked up at him, a question in her eyes.
VS.
Martha and George sat on the sofa reading. George shot to his feet. Martha looked up at him, her eyes rounded with alarm. “My God,” he said, “I’ve forgotten my name.”
VS.
Martha and George sat on the sofa reading. Suddenly, George leapt to his feet. [etc.]
By now it’s obvious what I’m going to say: Suddenly is unnecessary in any of the cases above, because there are so many other, more interesting, more authoritative ways of indicating suddenness. And in the third case, that verb, leapt, is doing all the work. No explaining required.
Because I believe every word should justify its existence, I’ll go back to a word I used in the first paragraph: almost. As in, “almost never.” So when is the word suddenly justified? In dialogue. Catherine, in Tennessee Williams’s Suddenly Last Summer, uses the word suddenly because, among other things, she’s got PTSD from having witnessed her cousin being murdered and now she’s in a mental hospital and her aunt wants to have her lobotomized. Catherine can say suddenly all she wants. That lady is processing some stuff! So if you’ve got characters who are also processing some stuff, who are telling their friends, “I was walking down the street minding my own business when this dude suddenly walked up and hit me” that’s A-okay. That character is also processing!
But you, when you are writing, are not processing. You know what you want to say, and you’ve got the words to say it, and one of them does not need to be suddenly. That word is using you for something evil.
Thanks for reading this far—you’re the best, and I hope this is helpful to you in your writing and self-editing. If you have a word that makes you cringe when you read it, let me know in comments. I’m curious! But if you love suddenly, please keep that to yourself.
Your most opinionated friend,
Peternelle
My word to stomp out in almost every situation is "somehow." I was SO guilty of overusing it early in my writing to try and introduce a touch of mystery. It was a terrible use of the word.
Suddenly, I realized that I needed to remove that word from novel manuscript.